be nice to people because the world is a shitty place and we all need a little help sometimes
can you illegally download sleep
I swear at least five of my two friends don’t like me
its not good sex unless u have to glue ur penis back on
The Book Thief
harry can defeat the dark lord but can’t pick up some bacon
he looks at it like he just dropped his hopes and dreams
Whoop there’s goes my bacon just like my parents and my pride.
WHOEVER BUYS THIS FOR ME WINS MY ETERNAL LOVE
I OWN THIS
EVERY MORNING HE SAYS SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT HOW THE WORLD NEEDS YOU AND YOU HAVE TO GET UP
AND WHEN YOU PRESS THE BUTTON TO HUSH HIM HE SAYS “DEFTLY DONE, MADAM,” OR “IF IT’S NOT TOO FORWARD OF ME, THAT DID TICKLE, MADAM”
IT WAKES YOU UP WITH THE SOUND OF CHIRPING BIRDS BEFORE STEPHEN FRY’S VOICE
EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE ONE
THIS IS LIKE JARVIS.
A REAL JARVIS EXCEPT HE’S A CLOCK.
I will always reblog this.
Hey look John Green being a decent man, and an awesome mentor for his thousands of thousands of followers and fans who are girls.
Man what an asshole.